REBTOZ

Making kids less self disturbable? What does this mean? Aren’t people disturbed by things that happen to them? Don’t we hear ourselves and others say ‘it’ makes me mad when so and so happens? Wouldn’t the world be a better place if what’s her name was this way instead of that way? etc. If we could make ‘it’ disappear then we’d all feel better wouldn’t we? ''Please make it so that I will not be inconvenienced today and that my day will be one free of discomfort and full of joy!'' we implore. We can wish this be the case but can we guarantee it will be that way? The problem is that inevitably we will experience discomfort in our day and how disturbed we make ourselves depend on what we expect of our day in the first place. How do we view the events of the day? Epictetus 'Men are disturbed not by things, but by the view which they take of them.' The students that come to see me are dealing with questions like; why must I do writing when I want t...

‘You can’t teach young students the ABC Theory of Emotional Disturbance and it should only be used by a trained psychologist in the counselling setting.’ Albert Ellis railed against this kind of misinformation put forth to preserve the status of the psychologist as ‘expert.’ Ellis of course wanted his ABC Theory of Emotional Disturbance to be accessible to all, especially to teachers and students. Far better that young children learn why they feel and act as they do and to develop insights and skills preventatively and educatively in the school setting. Jonas Salk who created the polio vaccine hypothesised that if we could ‘psychologically immunise’ students they would be less prone to mental health issues and would probably be physically better off too. Bat Fink, the cartoon character said to his enemies ‘your bullets cannot harm me, my wings are like shields of steel?’ He would wrap his wings around himself deflecting any harmful bullets from hitting him, thwarting...

Unconditional Self Acceptance (USA) protects us from the slings and arrows that life tests us with. It is how we deal with adversity that is key to remaining strong and purposeful in living our lives productively. USA affords us a degree of psychological resilience and hence is a very useful 'habit of believing' to teach our students. How do you teach this? This questions has been addressed in previous posts and here is another idea to think about.  The cartoon character BatFink could protect himself by deflecting bullets with his 'wing shield.' Psychological resilience is a little like having a protective invisible shield that will allow factual and reasonable information through but will reject those things that are untrue and harmful. Unconditional Self Acceptance helps students understand that whilst they will experience failure and rejection, they themselves can never be failures or rejects. Their positive traits, characteristics and capabilities can't be can...