REBTOZ

Even the most competent and composed amongst us will say how we have battled or continue to battle our inner demons of self-doubt and low self-worth. Some would measure their self-worth against goals achieved and how popular they are with others. This kind of ‘confidence glow’ can be temporary if one is inclined to put all of their psychological well-being eggs in the same ‘self-esteem’ basket. Albert Ellis, creator of Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy, famously stated: ‘Self-esteem is the greatest sickness known to personkind because it’s conditional.’ We condition ourselves when we rehearse and re rehearse certain ingrained thought constructions that are unhelpful or helpful to us. Ellis claims, and I agree, that if a person’s self-worth is contingent on how others regard them or how well they do at tasks it can be very harmful. They will feel OK or not OK depending on which way the self-esteem winds blow! This is what Ellis called conditional self - worth, how one esteems...

It's been been a while since the last post and life continues to unfold often as planned and anticipated and at other times in a tangential manner. We seem to have a trajectory in mind, a vision how things might pan out, a virtual template to guide us on our way. Things don't (why should they?) always go as imagined but ain't that the spice of life? The odd happenstance from left field (where did that come from?) will issue forth a challenge to meet and negotiate, an invitation perhaps to reach beyond yourself. Or indeed it may be an unanticipated delight that stops you in your tracks and lays a subtle smile across your hitherto sullen (feels that way) countenance.  The odd curve ball that's hard to lay a bat on and strikes you out before making a play! The tee off goes awry and your 4th golf ball goes off into the rough never to be seen again and it's only hole 2 of 18! Shut up already with your sporting analogies I can hear some say. OK I hear you! So you've...

The Dalai Lama says to be kind wherever possible and that it’s always possible. He talks about ‘cultivating’ attitudes of kindness and to practise empathy and sincere concern for others. Then there’s ‘mindfulness’, practising awareness of our feelings and actions and our underlying attitudes. What are we doing? How are we feeling? How are we behaving? Kindness is catching! Albert Ellis talks about unconditional acceptance of others (UOA). This entails consciously and intentionally being aware of our prejudices and dislikes when considering others and not judging them totally on the basis of a disagreeable (to you) quality or characteristic. Random acts of kindness it is said is as good for the giver as it is for the receiver (givee?) because it engenders feelings of empathy and concern. It enables the release of endorphins which produce the ‘natural high’ we may experience. We can choose to act kindly towards others and the trick it seems is not to accept a...

Behaviour is linked to how we act and feel and Albert Ellis' ABC Theory of Emotional Disturbance is a useful tool to help us (teachers, counsellors, parents) understand what is 'making' that behaviour.  Should ought and must believing characterise a mindset that generates extreme negative feelings and self defeating behaviours. These constructions have taken away the individuals ability to think and act independently. How? Conditioned to live up to the expectations of others may render the individual impotent, powerless and paralysed. Consider young Sharon who was brought up to be a good girl. Her parents told her that she should always 'be' polite and she should never 'be' impolite. Polite people were good and 'impolite' people were bad . Sharon strove to be a good girl and to please her parents who would tell her how good she was when she did good . You know the story. Sharon developed extreme anxiety about making mistakes and 'disap...

Children are constructivists. They make sense of what's happening and put two and two together and make their own four. Depression is a condition that undermines our ability to engage with the world successfully. What habits of believing have we constructed? Do we know what they are? Can we do anything about it? Why do I feel as I feel? Good questions to ponder and Rational Emotive Behaviour Education facilitates the students capacity to think about their thinking, to examine the philosophies they hold. If we have constructed our depression by cultivating irrational (unhelpful, unhealthy) habits of believing then we can deconstruct it! We can constantly revisit the meanings we have made about our experiences and re examine them through the REBE lens. 'Am I worthless? What does this mean? What evidence is there to support this hypothesis? What reconstructed meanings can I make that best fit the evidence?' This kind of awareness and learning allows the person to monitor thei...

A group of schools in Whyalla, South Australia has been promoting student personal and academic capability development through Rational Emotive Behaviour Education (REBE) for over two years now. The Albert Ellis Centre Face Book page ( https://www.facebook.com/TheAlbertEllisProfessionalLearningCentre?ref=hl ) has documented the excellent work done by teachers at Stuart High School, Whyalla Stuart Campus R-7, Hincks Avenue Primary and Long Street Primary schools. Based on the work of Albert Ellis' (father of cognitive therapies) Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy professional and personal development programs have been provided through 'The Centre' for more than two years now. That equates to 400 plus educators, carers, counsellors and other allied professionals having been informed and skilled in the delivery of Ellis' ABC Theory of Emotional (and Behavioural) Disturbance in a variety of contexts - education and therapeutic interventions. This endeavor has bee...

Albert Ellis PhD. This appears in the current Jan/Feb 2013 edition of the  National Psychologist : Vol 22, No. 1. Dr Debbie Joffe Ellis talks about her late husband and his work: Dr Albert Ellis, Master Therapist. Albert Ellis, legendary pioneer in the field of cognitive psychology, was a genius. He created his approach of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), describing its methods and techniques in clear style - through his writings, presentations, trainings and therapy sessions. REBT was understood and embraced by people within the world of psychology and those from every walk of life. His whole-hearted and earnest goal was to help as many people as possible to suffer less emotional misery and to experience more happiness in their lives. His tireless work over more than six decades helped millions of people change their lives for the better. Yes, Albert Ellis was a genius. He was my mentor, my model. He also happened t...